Second Serenade: Chapter 10

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Even without consciously thinking about it, the change was obvious. Now that her hopes with Sunahara had crumbled, it felt like Takuma Aketo himself was coming into sharper focus for her. The things she had once only dreamed about were starting to take form. She was becoming more aware of him.

For a while after that tearful breakdown against his chest at the school festival, Otomo-san had been strangely distant, almost as if she were avoiding him out of embarrassment. But as time passed, that distance transformed into something else. It didn't take long for Aketo to notice. Her eyes followed him wherever he went, and every time he turned around, he found her looking at him. He could feel the faint stirrings of his old infatuation slowly rekindling.

But he couldn't just let himself feel happy about it. What would that mean for Sunahara if things really did work out with Otomo-san?

If he traced things back to the beginning, his relationship with Sunahara had started as nothing more than a way to keep Otomo-san at a distance. That was all it was supposed to be. But then, what exactly was Sunahara to him now? They went out together almost every weekend, had fun, made each other laugh, kissed in private corners... and when he thought about touching him, his heart raced. The word "romance" flickered in his mind before quickly dissipating.

"A romance... with a guy, huh?"

The words felt strangely unpleasant as they left his lips. And yet, there wasn't a more accurate way to describe the situation with Sunahara.

Aketo snapped his notebook shut, unable to focus on the notes he'd been trying to review. There had to be some other equation, some clearer answer to this mess of feelings. But what was the answer, really? Frustrated by his own tangled thoughts, he let himself collapse back onto his bed.

◇:-:◆:-:◇

What ultimately forced Aketo to confront his "answer" was Otomo-san's sudden confession.

It happened after school, when they unexpectedly crossed paths at the entrance. At the sight of him, she bolted out the door as if fleeing, and Aketo, puzzled but curious, followed her through the school gates. There, he saw her small, thin figure standing in the shadow of a tree, head bowed, slender fingers tightly clutching her bag, trembling slightly.

"Are you waiting for someone?" he asked.

Still looking down, she gave a small nod.

"I was... waiting for you, Aketo-kun."

Her voice was so faint it was almost swallowed by the evening air, but she didn't need to say anything more. Aketo reached out and gently took her slender hand in his. She startled, lifting her head to meet his gaze, her eyes glistening with the threat of fresh tears.

"Shall we walk home together?"

She gave a small, hesitant nod.

As they parted ways, she whispered, "I like you."

He accepted her confession on the spot. He was happy, in a way, but his heart remained oddly calm. It wasn't like the reality of the moment had somehow exceeded his expectations.

That night, Aketo lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about what to do with Sunahara. It was impossible to keep dating both of them. It just wouldn't work, and besides, getting caught in a two-timing situation would be catastrophic. After wrestling with his thoughts for a while, he arrived at a simple, inevitable conclusion:

There's no future with Sunahara.

Even if what they had could be considered a relationship, it was something he could never talk about. It would ruin his reputation, make his life more complicated, and they could never marry. People would gossip, and he hated the thought of being whispered about behind his back.

There it was—no matter how he looked at it, there wasn't a single positive thing about staying with Sunahara.

Better to end it now, while things were still relatively painless.

The car had slowed to a crawl, caught in a traffic jam that stretched like a slow-moving snake along the highway. Sunahara glanced irritably between his watch and the seemingly endless line of cars ahead before clicking his tongue in frustration.

"We'll take the next exit," he said. "It'll be a bit of a detour, but we'll stick to the main road from there. No point creeping along like this."

They were on their way back from the aquarium, about a three-hour drive away. The fish had been beautiful, the small seaside restaurant they'd stopped at for lunch had served a delicious pilaf, and overall it had been a perfect Sunday. But as the day wore on and the drive home drew closer, Aketo's mood had steadily darkened. He had spent the entire afternoon brooding over how to tell Sunahara that this would be their last time together like this, and in the end, he had let the evening slip away without saying a word.

When Aketo fell into a sullen silence, Sunahara, perhaps assuming his mood was just a reaction to the heavy traffic, veered off the highway at the next exit and merged onto the main road. They were already fairly close to home, and if they kept up this pace, they would be back within an hour.

"You tired?" Sunahara asked, breaking the silence.

Aketo forced a halfhearted smile, deflecting the question, and Sunahara didn't press further.

After another thirty minutes, Sunahara turned off the main road and pulled into the parking lot of a small coffee shop.

◇:-:◆:-:◇

When they sat down by the window, the setting sun was just visible through the glass. After placing their orders, Sunahara lit a cigarette, while Aketo took a sip of his water. There were no other customers around, and Aketo sensed this might be the perfect moment.

"Sensei," he said.

Sunahara, who had been staring blankly out the window, turned to look at him.

"I'm sorry for dragging you into my selfishness all this time."

Across the table, Sunahara tilted his head slightly, a hint of confusion in his expression.

"I never thought of it as selfish," he replied.

"I think... I’m finally ready to let you go," Aketo continued.

Sunahara's fingers, poised around his cigarette, froze for a moment.

"Looking back, I realize I was the one who was messed up. I had a lot going on back then and I just couldn't see things clearly... but I've finally started to settle down."

"Ah. I see," Sunahara murmured, stubbing his cigarette into the ashtray. Just then, their food arrived, cutting the conversation short.

They ate in silence, each bite stretching the awkwardness between them. When Aketo finished his meal, Sunahara seemed to take that as his cue, standing abruptly and grabbing the check.

Sunahara didn't say a word during the drive back. Aketo stole glances at his profile, wondering if he was angry, but the expression on his face revealed nothing. Sunahara hadn't shown any real reaction when Aketo had hinted at breaking things off—just a small nod, without a single word of protest.

For a brief, unsettling moment, Aketo wondered if Sunahara had never cared for him at all. They had kissed countless times, but perhaps that had been nothing more than a casual indulgence, a reflex of circumstance. Sunahara had never actually said he liked him. Maybe all those moments together had just been a matter of going with the flow.

Still, part of Aketo had braced for a more intense confrontation, and the fact that it hadn't come was something of a relief.

"We're here."

Aketo blinked, he must have dozed off at some point. He realized they'd stopped near the park close to his apartment complex. Sunahara never drove all the way up to Aketo's building, as the narrow streets around the public housing made it difficult to maneuver, so Sunahara always dropped him off here.

"I had a good time today," Aketo said as he unbuckled his seatbelt.

"Is that so," Sunahara replied, his tone flat and detached.

Aketo stepped out of the car and reached to close the door when Sunahara muttered something under his breath, sharp and bitter in self-deprecation:

"I really am the worst."

“Huh?” Aketo froze, hand still on the door.

He turned back in surprise, but before he could process the words, Sunahara yanked the door shut from the inside and floored the gas pedal.

The car shot off down the road, tires screeching against the pavement.

It was only then, as he watched the taillights disappear into the distance, that Aketo realized just how deeply Sunahara had been hurt.

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