Secret: Chapter 2 - Part 2

The content warning is in the footnotes⁰.

◇:*:◆:*:◇

After two or three weeks, as Mitsuru got used to the shop, he began handling simple customer service tasks in addition to washing dishes and tidying up. As a result, he started getting more attention from the customers.

He was tall, had a solid build, and a reasonably good-looking face. When Enomoto first brought him to the apartment, his hairstyle was like a little kid's, but since he was doing customer service work, even behind the scenes, Enomoto had tidied up his hair a bit, making him look much more refined. Being young on top of that, it was no surprise that he attracted attention.

Enomoto had warned the regular customers, saying, "He's someone important to me, so don't make a move on him," but the new customers naturally started hitting on him. The first time Mitsuru was approached, he quickly ran over to Enomoto, excitedly reporting, "That guy said he likes me!"

"He said he wants to go out with me."

The man Mitsuru pointed to looked like he was in his early thirties, someone Enomoto had never seen before.

"Are you happy to be hit on by a man?"

Mitsuru nodded vigorously.

"But you're not gay."

"I know, but it makes me happy. It's the first time someone’s told me they like me. I wonder what it is that he likes about me."

Mitsuru, who had been speaking with flushed cheeks, suddenly became somber, as if a shadow had crossed his face.

"If he finds out I'm a fool who can't even read or write, do you think he'll hate me?"

Enomoto held his forehead, finding Mitsuru's reaction almost childlike.

"I hate to break it to you, but that guy just wants to sleep with you. It’s not about liking your personality or anything like that. He probably just likes your looks, but in most cases, you’d go to a hotel, sleep together once, and that would be the end of it."

"What's that?"

Mitsuru looked puzzled.

"This is that kind of place. So when a customer says they like you, don't take them seriously. Just pretend you already have a boyfriend. You’re not planning to sleep with men or have a serious relationship, right?"

Mitsuru fell silent and looked down. Even after that, he was frequently approached by customers, but he turned them down by saying, as Enomoto had taught him, "I have a boyfriend." Mitsuru's childlike way of speaking and naturally gentle tone helped him avoid any awkwardness with the customers he rejected.

Since Mitsuru started living with him, Enomoto had been using hotels whenever he had sex. Even though they had separate rooms, the doors weren’t soundproof. For a teenage virgin, the sounds of intimacy were too intense. And since they worked at the same place, their schedules were the same. Whenever Enomoto was at home, Mitsuru was there too, which was becoming a problem.

One freezing night in mid-February, on the bar's day off, Enomoto went out drinking and ended up bringing a guy back to the apartment in a moment of enthusiasm. He was drunk and had completely forgotten about his roommate's presence. Enomoto was pushed down by the rough, beastly man and went along with it, having sex right there in the living room.

When he woke up, he was wrapped in a blanket, sleeping on the living room sofa. The heater was on, so he hadn’t felt cold even with just the blanket. The man was gone, apparently having left after they were done. The blanket was one Enomoto usually used in his bedroom, so Mitsuru must have covered him with it.

The thought that Mitsuru had definitely seen them made him feel gloomy, especially with the hangover. He didn’t mind spreading his legs and showing off to strangers, but it was embarrassing to have been seen by someone he was close to, especially by a straight guy. Mitsuru knew Enomoto was gay, but only in words, not in action. Enomoto had never kissed a man in front of him. Seeing what actually went on... The methods were probably not so different from heterosexuals, but it wouldn’t be surprising if Mitsuru found it disgusting and started looking down on him.

Regretting it wouldn’t change the fact that he had brought a man into the apartment and had sex with him. If Mitsuru ended up despising him, he would simply kick him out. I’m the owner of this place; what’s wrong with bringing a man here? Enomoto muttered half defiantly as he got up from the sofa. His body felt sticky, and his mouth was unpleasantly dry. As he was walking toward the shower, wearing just a shirt, he ran into Mitsuru in the hallway.

The moment Mitsuru saw Enomoto, his face turned bright red, and he dashed into his room. Enomoto, left behind, felt his ears heat up as well. I’m the one who should be embarrassed here, being seen naked after the deed! he thought as he got into the shower, washing away the remnants of the man he could hardly remember, except for the fact that he was excessively well-endowed.

When Enomoto returned to the living room, Mitsuru was sitting alone on the sofa. When he noticed Enomoto, he hurriedly looked down. It was awkward to face each other, but living together meant they couldn’t avoid it. Enomoto decided to push past the embarrassment and act normal.

"Do you want something to drink?"

Mitsuru said, "Anything's fine," so Enomoto made coffee for the both of them. Even when he handed Mitsuru his cup, Mitsuru kept his head down and didn’t look at him.

"Sorry about last night. I was drunk and brought a guy home."

Still looking down, Mitsuru mumbled softly, "Oh, okay."

"It would’ve been one thing if it were in my room, but doing it in the living room was a bad idea."

There was no response from Mitsuru. Enomoto began to worry that he was about to say something decisive and harsh... and suddenly felt scared of his younger cousin.

"I’m sorry."

To his surprise, Mitsuru apologized instead.

"Why are you apologizing? I’m the one who was in the wrong."

"Because... because I saw…"

Mitsuru’s trembling voice made Enomoto blush. He had once had sex in a cruising park, unconcerned about being seen by others, even finding it exciting. Yet being caught by his younger cousin in their apartment was something else entirely.

"Sorry for showing you something so gross."

"I was… excited."

Mitsuru muttered, and as Enomoto grasped the meaning of his words, he burst out laughing. Mitsuru’s honesty was amusing.

"Well, there’s not much difference between what men and women do."

"Does that make me gay?"

"No, it doesn’t. You just reacted to something stimulating, that’s all."

When Enomoto laughed, Mitsuru leaned forward with a serious expression.

"But I was really excited."

"Have you ever looked at a man and wanted to kiss or touch him?"

Mitsuru shook his head.

"Then you’re definitely straight. Maybe working in our bar has made you think that being with men is normal, but that’s not the case. The world is mostly made up of men and women. When you start working somewhere else, you’ll meet girls naturally."

Mitsuru furrowed his brow, looking deep in thought, and then glanced up at Enomoto.

"Was that guy yesterday your boyfriend, Takanori-san?"

Mitsuru hit a sore spot.

"That guy? Let’s just say he was a one-night friend with mutual interests."

"Good," Mitsuru muttered.

"What’s good about that?"

"I’m glad he wasn’t your boyfriend."

"What kind of guy would you approve of as my boyfriend?"

Enomoto asked jokingly, but Mitsuru replied seriously.

"I don’t really know, but I didn’t like that guy. He wasn’t kind to you, Takanori-san."

For a moment, Enomoto felt a soft ache deep in his chest. If his younger cousin hadn’t been straight, he would’ve fallen for him right then and there. Enomoto looked down, scratching his neck to hide his embarrassment.

He had no idea that just half a month later, he would end up in bed with his younger cousin.

◇:*:◆:*:◇

It had been about two weeks since Enomoto had been seen having sex with a man. That day, Mitsuru was blatantly in a bad mood. Since he was always smiling, his foul mood was even more noticeable. If that was all, Enomoto would have overlooked it thinking, "Everyone has bad days," but he didn’t even say "Welcome" or "Thank you" to the customers, and when spoken to, he barely responded.

Enraged by his incredibly rude attitude, Enomoto yelled at Mitsuru when they got back to the apartment.

"Why were you acting so unpleasantly?"

"Do you even understand what it means to work in customer service?"

No matter how much he scolded, Mitsuru, who hung his head, didn't offer a word of reflection. On the contrary, he seemed to grow even angrier.

"If you have something to say to me, say it clearly! I can’t understand if you stay silent."

When Enomoto forcefully slapped the kitchen table where he had placed a plastic bottle, Mitsuru lifted his head and looked directly at Enomoto.

"I like you, Takanori."

"Huh?" Enomoto's voice escaped through his nose.

"What are you talking about?"

"That man from the other day came to the shop. You said he was just a one-night friend."

Taken aback by Mitsuru's harsh tone, Enomoto faltered.

"Well, as a customer, it's possible he might come to the shop."

"I don't like it."Clenching his fists, Mitsuru shouted.

"You can't choose customers based on your likes and dislikes. If you put it that way, I've slept with half of our regulars. Are you planning to drive them all away from the shop?"

Mitsuru's eyes widened, and his lips trembled slightly. He bit his quivering lips firmly.

"Make me your lover, Takanori-san."

"You're not gay."

"I am gay. Because I fell in love with you, Takanori-san."

The simplicity of the man in front of him was no longer amusing; it had turned into anger. When Enomoto was younger, he had his own struggles and self-loathing about falling in love with another man. But Mitsuru seemed to have skipped over all that, casually declaring "I love you" based on nothing more than a fleeting feeling. It infuriated him.

"You're just confused because you saw us having real sex, like in a porn video!"

"That's not true. I love you, Takanori-san. Ever since I saw you, I've been thinking about it over and over. I thought about it deeply, and even after all that, I realized I still love you. I love your kindness. I love your smile. And because I love you, I want to have sex with you."

He doesn't understand. He has no idea what it really means to cross that line.

"I want to be your lover, Takanori-san. I want to have sex with you and be gentle."

"Quit joking around! Who do you think would want anything to do with you?"

Mitsuru looked at Enomoto with sad eyes.

"Takanori-san, do you hate me because I'm stupid?"

"Nobody said anything like that!"

How much does this guy understand that they're cousins and of the same gender? Besides, Enomoto was only looking after Mitsuru because his mother asked him to, so he had a certain level of responsibility. What's more, he is still a minor at 16 years old. Ugh, what a hassle. How did it come to this? I'm already going out of my way to take care of him out of kindness, so why should I have to deal with even more trouble?

He felt like slapping a return label on his annoying cousin and sending him back to uncle Itaru. The one who benefits the most from this situation is uncle Itaru. He offloaded something he hated, something annoying, onto me and is now living his life carefree, forgetting all about the inconvenience.

What if… Enomoto wondered. What would uncle Itaru think if Mitsuru turned out to be gay? A blemish on his perfectionist uncle. Mitsuru, who should have been brilliant because he was his son, but couldn’t even turn out normal. If on top of that, Mitsuru had some abnormal sexual preferences, it would only add to his uncle's shame and hurt his pride even more.

Enomoto laughed. The thought of getting revenge on his uncle was immensely satisfying.

"...If you really want to sleep with me that badly, maybe I should oblige."

Looking up at his cousin, who had grown taller than him in just six months, Enomoto narrowed his eyes.

"I’ll give you a taste of what it's like to be with a man."

◇:*:◆:*:◇

The first time they had sex, it was entirely under Enomoto’s lead. Mitsuru had no idea how to go about it, so Enomoto had no choice but to guide him. Once the anger and excitement subsided, Enomoto regretted sleeping with Mitsuru. Even though it was a way to spite his uncle Itaru, he should never have laid a hand on Mitsuru, who was underage.

Enomoto had intended for it to be a one-time thing. However, Mitsuru didn’t seem to think the same way and began to openly crave Enomoto’s body. No matter how many times Enomoto said, “No,” Mitsuru wouldn’t listen. Exasperated by his persistence, Enomoto begrudgingly slept with him again. Even though the sex was not what he wanted, Enomoto, wanting to at least feel good, instructed the clumsy Mitsuru on how to do it right. Once a physical relationship is established, it’s hard to break, and before long, they had slept together three times, four times, and more. With each encounter, the guilt diminished, and Mitsuru became more adept at handling another man’s body.

As Mitsuru grew accustomed to it, he started hitting all of Enomoto’s sweet spots with precision. To be precise, he would only touch the areas where he could see Enomoto reacted with pleasure. What began as hesitant, tentative movements within Enomoto evolved into targeted, concentrated attacks on his most sensitive points, driving Enomoto to the edge of ecstasy.

Mitsuru’s hip movements were unique, pulling out pleasure from Enomoto’s body at unimaginable angles. He would whisper with delight, “No matter where I enter you, I know exactly how your insides are.”

The sex felt good, and afterward, Mitsuru would tenderly take care of him. Being told “I love you” wasn’t unpleasant either. Most of all, the way Mitsuru clung to him was adorable. For about two months, Enomoto spent his time playfully entwined with Mitsuru, almost like lovers. His desires were fully satisfied, so he didn’t feel the need to seek out other men.

But no matter how amazing the sex was, doing the same thing every time got boring. He wanted to sample something else. The reason Enomoto never stuck with one partner for long—his quick boredom—began to rear its head. He had no complaints about Mitsuru; their physical compatibility was great. But without excitement, Enomoto couldn’t ignite the same passion.

As he grew tired of the sex, Enomoto found his younger cousin, with whom he had become intimately involved, increasingly irritating. Even when he was tempted by a man who was his type, Mitsuru would sense the mood and get in the way. With eyes full of jealousy, he would repeatedly scold, “You have me, Takanori-san.” It was Enomoto who had led Mitsuru on, and at first, he listened to him out of guilt. But as Mitsuru continued to say the same thing over and over, Enomoto’s frustration built up until, finally, it exploded.

"Don’t interfere with what I do," Enomoto shouted as he dragged Mitsuru out through the back door of the shop. Mitsuru had gone so far as to deliberately spill water on a customer who had been flirting with Enomoto.

"That guy was trying to seduce you, Takanori-san," Mitsuru muttered in a stiff tone, standing under the drizzle with the dim light casting shadows around him.

"And what’s wrong with that?"

"If you want to have sex, do it with me."

Enomoto let out a loud sigh. "I’m already doing it with you, aren’t I? Let me have a break sometimes."

"A break from what?" Mitsuru frowned.

"I get bored with the same partner. Let me sleep with someone else once in a while."

Mitsuru's body trembled. "N-no, I won’t allow it. Why would you say something like that? Don’t cheat on me."

Enomoto roughly ran his hands through his hair. "…Sorry, but I never intended to be in a relationship with you."

Mitsuru’s face looked on the verge of tears as he grabbed Enomoto’s arms. "Why would you say that? I’m your boyfriend, aren’t I?"

"I think you’re cute. The sex isn’t bad either. But this is who I am," Enomoto said, placing a hand on his chest.

"If you want me to be gentle, I’ll be gentle. If you want to sleep together, I’ll sleep with you. But to be honest, I get bored with just you. If you want someone who only needs one person, find someone else."

Mitsuru shook his head. "No, I don’t want anyone else. I want you, Takanori-san."

Finally, Mitsuru started crying. Like a child, he covered his eyes with both hands and crouched down. Enomoto looked down at him for a while, then took a deep breath and shouted, "Stop crying!"

Mitsuru’s body jerked, and he looked up with a tear-streaked face.

"I’ve told you the truth. Whether you understand it or not, this is the kind of person I am. No matter how much you cry, I’m not going to change… and I don’t intend to."

Enomoto crouched down beside Mitsuru. "There are all kinds of people in this world. You might think sex is something special, but men… well, we’re the kind of creatures who get hard when we see someone naked, and if there’s a good-looking hole, we want to stick it in. That’s just how we are."

Mitsuru sniffled. "I… I only had sex with you because I love you, Takanori-san. I never thought it could be just with anyone."

"I’m sorry… No, I knew. I guess I always kind of knew. You’re not the type to take things lightly. I shouldn’t have slept with you. It felt good, so I kept doing it, but it wasn’t right. I’m sorry."

The drizzle turned into rain, the warm kind unique to June. Still crouched down, Enomoto pulled Mitsuru back into the shop. Mitsuru, now dazed, showed no sign of wanting to work. Enomoto whispered to the other staff to leave Mitsuru alone. The customers dwindled, and soon the shop was closing. After a quick cleanup, the staff left.

Enomoto dragged Mitsuru, who was huddled in a corner of the kitchen, and forced him onto a stool at the counter. Mitsuru kept his head down, refusing to look up. Enomoto handed him a glass. "Drink this."

Mitsuru didn’t touch it for a while, but suddenly grabbed the glass and downed it in one gulp.

"Hey! Take it easy!" Enomoto scolded. Even though it was diluted, it was still alcohol. Sure enough, Mitsuru started coughing violently.

"What idiot drinks it all at once?" Enomoto rubbed Mitsuru’s back, now rounded from crying. Mitsuru’s swollen eyelids stared at him. Enomoto leaned in and kissed the boy’s tear-streaked lips, still tasting faintly of alcohol.

"This is the last time… I’m not going to kiss you or have sex with you anymore. I know it’s hypocritical of me to say this, but you should find someone with whom you can have a normal relationship."

Mitsuru looked as though the world was ending, and Enomoto slowly patted his head.

"I can’t be your lover, but I do think you’re cute."

Mitsuru, the cousin who had been thrust into his life, came with a sense of responsibility and a certain irritation. Having Mitsuru around wasn’t always "good" for Enomoto, but the affection he felt was real.

"You should quit this job and find work somewhere else."

"You’re abandoning me too, Takanori-san?" Mitsuru’s voice was faint.

"You're going to throw me away like Dad and Mom did," Mitsuru said.

"It’s not like that. You've been working here for six months, and you've picked up some customer service skills, right? Honestly, this place isn’t the best environment for you. Next, you should work somewhere more normal. You’ll meet more people, and it’ll broaden your perspective."

"You’re just saying that because I’m a burden, and you want to get rid of me."

"Cut it out, you little brat."

When Enomoto yelled, Mitsuru straightened up like a student scolded by a teacher.

"I’m not telling you to move out. I’m saying you should see more of the world. Work somewhere normal, make friends—whether they're men or women, it doesn’t matter. And if things get tough, I’ll always listen. Whether it’s something happy, or just complaints, I’ll listen to you as many times as you need."

Mitsuru didn’t nod. Instead, he just kept crying, forming a puddle of tears on the counter.

◇:*:◆:*:◇

Footnotes

0. Content warning: NSFW, i*cest, p*dophilia.

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