Yellow Diamond: Chapter 2 - part 8

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Even after returning home, Shun’ichi couldn’t calm down. He paced restlessly around the room. Time passed without him doing anything, and his anxiety grew. Kunihiko would definitely come to take Isamu away. He was sure of it. Agitated, Shun’ichi bit his nails. Kunihiko had used the word "fight." But even if he fought, there was no way a junior high schooler like him could win against an adult like Kunihiko. The reality that he had no chance of winning made the world seem darker. Fight, fight... As the word tumbled in his mind, suddenly, as if a light had flashed from the sky, an idea struck him. If he couldn’t win by fighting, maybe he could run. Maybe he could escape with Isamu to somewhere Kunihiko couldn’t reach them.

He needed to hurry. There wasn’t much time. Urged by that thought, he pulled out a large bag from the closet. He stuffed it full with clothes and anything important. Then, at 6 PM, when Isamu came home from work, Shun’ichi grabbed his hand and dragged him outside, leaving behind a room that looked as if a burglar had ransacked it. The sun hadn’t completely set, but heavy clouds gathering in the western sky made the surroundings dim earlier than usual.

“Where are we even going?” Isamu asked over and over as they walked, letting Shun’ichi pull him along. Each time, Shun’ichi avoided answering, muttering only “somewhere,” without revealing their destination. They entered the crowded train station during rush hour, and Shun’ichi stared at the route map. After only a few seconds of hesitation, he borrowed some money from Isamu and bought two tickets for the farthest destination they could reach.

“Where’s this train going?” Isamu asked again as they squeezed into the packed train, so full they couldn’t even lift their arms.

“Somewhere.”

Isamu frowned, his face full of confusion.

“No matter how many times I ask, all you say is ‘somewhere.’ Where exactly is ‘somewhere?’”

Shun’ichi glanced up at the ceiling, his gaze catching sight of a travel poster. It showed a smiling girl standing in front of a blue ocean and white sandy beach.

“We’re going to the sea,” he blurted, an excuse born out of desperation.

For some reason, that answer seemed to satisfy Isamu, and he didn’t ask where they were going again. After about thirty minutes on the train, more people were getting off than boarding, and soon the crowd had thinned out. Shun’ichi found a seat and sat down. Next to him, Isamu started fiddling with his black fingernails, probably out of boredom now that his phone battery had died. A middle-aged woman sitting nearby glanced at them disapprovingly before looking away.

As night fell, the evening outside the train windows grew darker. The lights from houses blinked by one after another, casting a lonely feeling over Shun’ichi. After almost an hour of rattling along, the train finally reached its final stop, the end of the line. It was a completely unfamiliar place, and being night only added to the uncertainty of where they should go. Shun’ichi stood in front of a map panel near the station exit, trying to decide. He had mentioned the sea, so maybe they should at least try to find it. But he didn’t even know if it was possible to walk there, or if it was close enough to reach on foot. Yet staying at the station would only make Isamu suspicious, so he set off toward a nearby park.

The park they reached after a five-minute walk was far smaller than Shun’ichi had imagined. It was only about half the size of a classroom, with a sandbox, a slide, and a single bench. A lone vending machine stood in the corner, swarmed by tiny insects that buzzed like the ringing in one’s ears. Shun’ichi sat down at the edge of the bench, and Isamu placed his heavy bag on the ground before sitting next to him.

“Let’s live here,” Shun’ichi said, gripping Isamu’s hand tightly.

“Here?” Isamu glanced around the small park, his expression uncertain.

“Are we going to live in the park?”

“No, of course not. I meant we’ll rent an apartment nearby and live there. I’ll transfer schools, and you can find a new job. No one knows us here, so this time we can start fresh.”

“Why are you suddenly talking about moving? Do you hate where we live now?”

“Well, yeah… kind of.”

Isamu mumbled a quiet, “I see…” but didn’t say anything more, lowering his head. Shun’ichi had no attachment to the junior high school where he had gone through so much. But it wasn’t like he was so desperate that he really wanted to transfer schools either. Isamu didn’t hate his trash collection job, though he didn’t love it either. But the biggest reason for all of this was Kunihiko—the man who said he would take Isamu away. That’s why Shun’ichi ran before Kunihiko could do just that. To somewhere no one knew them.

The park was quiet at night. All that could be heard was the distant barking of a dog, with no sign of people nearby. If only the world was just the two of them, Shun’ichi thought, it would be so much easier. If it was just him and Isamu, there wouldn’t be anyone to mock them, no hurtful words to make his chest ache.

“It’s lonely here. Why don’t we just go home?” Isamu said softly, but going back would make everything pointless. In a firm voice, Shun’ichi refused, “No.”

“If you don’t like it here, we can go somewhere else,” he added. Isamu, still looking troubled, mumbled, “But…” and tilted his head. Shun’ichi stood up from the bench, forcing a smile as he spread his arms wide.

“Okay then, let’s go really far away! Like, to Okinawa or something.”

The idea of living in a warm place, just the two of them, sounded nice to Shun’ichi. But Isamu’s face only grew more strained. He scratched his head with his dirty black nails, glancing between Shun’ichi and the ground, before dropping his shoulders.

“I don’t want to go that far. And Kunihiko…”

As soon as he said the name, Isamu raised his head in a panic, realizing he had mentioned the one person guaranteed to make Shun’ichi angry. He clammed up awkwardly. But it was too late—the image of Kunihiko’s confident smile from the crosswalk earlier flashed vividly in Shun’ichi’s mind, and the irritation rose up again.

“Why do you keep talking about Kunihiko? It’s weird! You’re an adult now, Isamu! You should be able to do things on your own!” Shun’ichi’s voice echoed through the quiet park, his frustration spilling over. The sound of a few motorcycles roaring by on the nearby road followed, cutting through the silence. Isamu kept his head down, saying nothing, his posture slouched so that his face was hidden. Shun’ichi perched on the bench, resting his heels on the edge as he hugged his knees, waiting impatiently for his father to make a decision. But no matter how long he waited, Isamu didn’t say a word.

Boredom began to creep in, and to make matters worse, his stomach started growling loudly, reminding him of his hunger.

“My tooth hurts,” Isamu muttered suddenly. When Shun’ichi looked over, Isamu was holding his left cheek, his expression on the verge of tears. He repeated, “My tooth hurts.”

“Does it really hurt that bad?”

Isamu gave a small nod.

“What am I supposed to do about a toothache?” Shun’ichi thought out loud, his frustration mixing with concern. “Maybe the drugstore has painkillers or something. Let’s go check it out together.”

But as he stood up and began to walk, he felt a tug on his clothes. Isamu, his face pale, was gripping the hem of Shun’ichi’s shirt tightly.

“It hurts a lot. I think I need to see a dentist.”

“A dentist? But…”

Shun’ichi glanced at his watch—it was already 8 PM. Maybe their regular dentist would have made an exception, but there was no way a new one would take them after hours like this. Isamu still looked like he was on the verge of crying, and Shun’ichi, unsure of what to do, began pacing nervously around the bench.

"Let’s go home," Isamu muttered as he slowly stood up.

"If we go home, it’ll be the same thing all over again. If you can just bear it, let’s wait until morning and go to the dentist first thing," Shun’ichi said.

Isamu shook his head. "No, we need an insurance card to go to the hospital. Without it, it’ll cost a fortune."

Insurance card, insurance card—Isamu kept repeating. Now that Shun’ichi thought about it, when he was packing important things into the bag, he’d found the bankbook and stamp on top of the bookshelf, but the insurance card was nowhere to be found. Isamu hated cleaning, so he probably stashed it somewhere and forgot about it, but Shun’ichi hadn’t worried too much at the time.

"I didn’t see it in the bookshelf. Where did you put it?"

Isamu fell silent, most likely embarrassed because he’d lost it.

"Even if we go home now, there’s no guarantee we’ll find it."

"I didn’t lose it. I have it… but…"

"Then where is it? I’ll go get it."

Isamu glanced up at Shun’ichi, his eyes uncertain, like he was gauging Shun’ichi’s mood. Hesitantly, he answered.

"At Kunihiko’s place."

The moment he heard that, Shun’ichi’s head grew hot with rage, fury bubbling up inside him.

"Why is your insurance card at Kunihiko’s house?!"

"Kunihiko said, ‘It’d be safer if you leave it at my place.’"

Shun’ichi angrily stomped on his bag with his left foot. No matter how far they’d come, Kunihiko’s presence still loomed over them, and it infuriated him.

"So, just because Kunihiko says so, you do whatever he tells you? What’s next, you’re gonna leave your bankbook and your stamp with him too? Don’t leave important stuff to other people!"

Isamu brought his small hands to his mouth and mumbled quietly.

"Remember when you were in elementary school and had that bad accident? The one where you had to get stitches in your head? That’s when I realized I had lost my insurance card, and it caused a lot of trouble. We couldn’t find it anywhere, and I had to get a new one. Kunihiko was so angry—he yelled at me, asking why I hadn’t taken better care of something so important. I felt so bad, I almost cried. Ever since then, I’ve left the insurance card with Kunihiko. It’s way safer with him than with me."

Shun’ichi couldn’t help but shout.

"Enough already! Why do you always rely on Kunihiko for everything?!"

"Because… I’m not confident. I’ve already lost it once, and I’m bad at cleaning. I always forget where I put things…"

Isamu’s voice was desperate as he tried to explain, his expression sincere.

"Whatever!" Shun’ichi let out a deep breath and grabbed Isamu by the wrist.

"Let’s go to the drugstore now and buy some painkillers. Then in the morning, we’ll go to the dentist, with or without the insurance card. I don’t care how much it costs!"

He tried to pull Isamu along, but Isamu’s feet seemed glued to the ground, refusing to move.

"I want to go home."

Isamu wasn’t following along at all. Why wouldn’t he listen? Where exactly did he mean by "home"? That rundown apartment or Kunihiko’s place? Shun’ichi wasn’t so oblivious that he couldn’t figure it out. He knew all too well, and it made his skin prickle with anger. The frustration, the bitterness, the helplessness—all of it welled up inside him, and tears stung the corners of his eyes. He yanked his hand away from his father’s grip.

"Is Kunihiko really that important to you? Are you saying he’s more important than me?!"

Isamu stayed silent again. He couldn’t say that Shun’ichi was more important. Shun’ichi’s chest throbbed painfully, as if someone had jammed a fork into his heart and was twisting it around. After a long pause, Isamu finally spoke.

"But you’re still in junior high school. You’ll make friends, and you’ll meet girls you like in the future. But for me… it’s over. I’m over 30, I’m not smart, I’m broke, and no one wants to be friends with me—not girls, not anyone…"

Shun’ichi couldn’t understand why his dad was rambling on about all this.

"I’m here for you. I’ll stay by your side forever."

But Isamu only shook his head.

"Shun’ichi, you’re my son, but I’ve never thought we’d be together forever. Someday, you’ll have your own family, and we’ll drift apart. Maybe it won’t be like my parents, where I completely lost track of them, but even if we’re related by blood, we’ll still grow distant."

Isamu’s eyes were turning red.

"Then I’ll be left all alone. When I’m an old man, the only person who’ll still care about me will be Kunihiko. And with Kunihiko by my side, I feel safe. Sure, he’s a jerk sometimes, always yelling at me and pissing me off, but I know he only does it because he cares…"

Isamu paused.

"When I’m with Kunihiko, I can even accept the parts of myself I hate. Maybe it sounds strange, and I know you think I’m weird, Shun’ichi, but I can’t see my feelings as a lie, or something strange."

His words, usually delivered with a carefree smile, felt more honest than ever. Shun’ichi could feel the weight of his father’s emotions, but even so, he couldn’t bring himself to accept Kunihiko. Isamu was his father, not Kunihiko’s.

"Then tell me this—if I and Kunihiko were both drowning, who would you save? You could only save one of us. Who would you choose?"

Isamu didn’t hesitate.

"I’d save you, Shun’ichi."

Even though Shun’ichi had expected that answer, somewhere deep inside, he was relieved it wasn’t “Kunihiko.” But then, Isamu added something else.

"And after I save you, I’d die too."

"What? What are you even talking about?"

Shun’ichi couldn’t understand why Isamu was talking about dying.

"If I could only save one person, then Kunihiko would die, right? I couldn’t live with that."

Isamu’s tone was completely serious.

"So you’re okay with leaving me behind all alone? That’s horrible!"

"You still have your whole life ahead of you. And even if I died, Riku’s parents would probably take care of you…"

Even if he had a future, it meant nothing without Isamu. Being sent to live with his mother’s parents would be cruel. Shun’ichi clenched his fists so tightly that his nails dug into his palms. In the end, Isamu cared more about Kunihiko than about his own child. Kunihiko was more important than Shun’ichi—he had to face that painful truth.

"That’s it! I don’t care about you anymore, Isamu! If you want to go home, go ahead and do it alone. I’m not going back. I’ll live by myself, work by myself, and do whatever I want on my own!"

Shun’ichi grabbed the heavy bag and threw it at Isamu. It hit his thigh with a dull thud before falling to the ground.

"Go wherever you want. I don’t care!"

Isamu stood frozen, his expression blank.

"Don’t say things like that," he muttered.

"I’d feel better if you were gone! You’re always smiling like an idiot, you’re dumb, and you always stink. I don’t need a dad like you. You’ve only ever made me feel embarrassed..."

As Shun’ichi spoke, Isamu’s face twisted, like a reflection in water after a stone is thrown in. But despite the pain on his face, Isamu forced a smile, a helpless grin.

"Why are you smiling?!" Shun’ichi shouted, feeling mocked, his frustration boiling over.

"I’m sorry," Isamu said with that same smile. But his blackened fingertips were clenched tightly, trembling. Shun’ichi knew that the line between crying and smiling could be thin. He could tell Isamu was holding back tears.

"I don’t know what to do anymore..." Isamu said, scratching his head roughly. A single tear rolled down his smiling face. Even as he lowered his head, he kept that smile, though his shoulders trembled as sobs mixed with his shaking breath. Isamu crouched down, overwhelmed. His back looked impossibly small. Shun’ichi had never thought his father could seem so weak, so fragile. He’d never seen him cry like this before.

"I-Isamu..."

His father’s head didn’t even flinch at Shun’ichi’s call. Slowly, Shun’ichi moved closer and crouched down next to him, gently pressing a hand to his back.

"Come on, Isamu..."

Isamu rubbed his wet, red face hard against the sleeve of his blue work uniform.

"I just want to die," he whispered.

Those words clenched around Shun’ichi’s throat, a suffocating weight of guilt settling deep inside. Why would his father say something like that? And worse—he knew it was because of him. He had driven Isamu to this, cornered him the same way those bullies had cornered him. The realization was unbearable.

"I’m sorry, I’m sorry... I love you, Isamu. I love you..."

Shun’ichi’s chest tightened as emotion surged through him, and he started to cry, too. They sat together on the dirt ground, facing each other, crying louder and louder until their voices grew hoarse, like two dying roosters.

Shun’ichi wanted to blame someone—anyone. But in the end, there was no one to blame. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. If there was something to condemn, it was his own weak heart.

◇:-:◆:-:◇

The sound of a motorcycle’s exhaust woke Shun’ichi. The sky was still pale, with the first hints of dawn breaking through. He glanced at his watch: 5:50 AM. Letting out a small yawn, he stretched his arms, feeling the stiffness in his back creak and crack. Half-asleep, he looked around the unfamiliar scenery, wondering where he was. As he sat up, several layers of jackets that had been piled on top of him fell to the ground. Realizing he’d been sleeping on a bench, memories of the previous night came flooding back vividly.

Panicked, he searched for his father. Isamu was sleeping right below him, on a bed of newspapers, using a bag as a pillow. Even in the pale morning light, Shun’ichi could see how red and swollen Isamu’s eyelids were. The bark of a dog caught his attention, and when he turned, he saw an old man walking a large black dog down the sidewalk, casting a suspicious glance at them as he passed by the park.

Shun’ichi’s stomach growled loudly. He hadn’t eaten anything since the night before, and hunger was gnawing at him.

"Isamu... hey, Isamu," he said, gently shaking his father. Isamu squirmed a little, rubbing his face against the bag before slowly opening his eyes.

"I’m hungry," Shun’ichi said.

"Oh... yeah," Isamu muttered. With his dirty black hand, he rubbed his swollen eyelids roughly.

"Don’t rub your eyes with those dirty hands. If you don’t wash them properly, you’ll get an infection."

At Shun’ichi’s scolding, Isamu obediently went to the park’s water fountain and washed his hands and face.

"There’s a convenience store in front of the station, right? Do you have any money, Isamu?" Shun’ichi asked.

Isamu, shaking his wet face from side to side like a dog, yawned and said, "I’ve got about 1,500 yen. Was there a convenience store there?" He still seemed half-asleep, blinking drowsily even after washing his face. Shun’ichi grabbed his right hand and started walking. His memory of the convenience store near the station was correct, and they bought rice balls and tea, eating them on a bench in the station’s waiting area.

As they ate, the road in front of the station grew busier with cars. The shutters of the station’s kiosk clattered open, and Shun’ichi could almost see time speeding up around them. The first trains of the day began to run, and the station’s gates and waiting area became increasingly noisy. In the middle of it all, Shun’ichi and Isamu sat quietly, unmoving.

"Should we head home?" Shun’ichi asked, turning to his father. Isamu scratched his head roughly before mumbling, "Yeah, I guess."

"By the way, doesn’t your tooth hurt anymore?" Shun’ichi asked.

Isamu hurriedly touched his right cheek and said with a serious expression, "I think it still hurts." Yesterday, he had been complaining about his left cheek. It might have been a lie. But that didn’t matter anymore. Shun’ichi felt like he could forgive Isamu for lying, so he didn’t say anything.

◇:-:◆:-:◇

The final exams were over. After three grueling days of tests, what came next was a refreshing sense of freedom, regardless of the results. Shun’ichi shoved the textbooks and notes he had been frantically reviewing up until five minutes before the exam into his school bag. In the short time before the afternoon homeroom began, the classroom was buzzing with chatter.

“Hey,”

Ichihashi, the boy sitting next to him, spoke up.

“What was the answer to question four on the math test earlier?”

Shun’ichi tilted his head, thinking.

“Was it the geometry one? If so, I think it was thirty-four.”

Ichihashi’s face fell, and he sighed heavily.

“Though I might’ve gotten it wrong…”

“No, thanks,” Ichihashi muttered, still looking worried, repeating, “Thirty-four, huh…”

Three weeks earlier, during the awkward period before the end of the first semester, the seating arrangement had been shuffled. Shun’ichi now sat second from the back by the hallway-side window, while Mizusawa had been placed in the second seat from the front in the center row. With the distance between them, Shun’ichi no longer found himself as conscious of Mizusawa.

After the incident where Shun’ichi had hit Mizusawa, Mizusawa had taken three days off from school, seemingly to play the victim. On the fourth day, he returned, acting as if nothing had happened, hanging out with Yamashita, Tsutsui, and Mihara, his old group. He occasionally glared at Shun’ichi with disdain, but never spoke to him or apologized.

Being isolated from his old group, Shun’ichi found himself forcibly integrated into Akimori’s group. At first, he thought he wouldn’t fit in with such obviously serious kids, but after talking to them, he realized that wasn’t the case. Distancing himself completely from Mizusawa’s group allowed him to talk to people he hadn’t interacted with before, and he began to see things more clearly. He also noticed that many classmates didn’t have a very positive opinion of Mizusawa and his group.

While Shun’ichi still felt uneasy around Akimori, he got along well with Ichihashi. Ichihashi had pointed to Mizusawa’s group one day, saying, “I really can’t stand those guys. I used to think you were hard to approach because you were with them, but you’re actually kind of a goofball.” His blunt comment caught Shun’ichi off guard, and before he could respond, Akimori hurriedly chimed in, “That’s not true at all!” trying to smooth things over. Shun’ichi found Akimori’s constant politeness a bit forced, which only made him appreciate Ichihashi’s straightforwardness even more.

It seemed that Ichihashi found Shun’ichi interesting too, and the fact that they sat next to each other only added to their frequent conversations over the past two weeks. One day, they were laughing like idiots during break over the quirks of their English teacher, and when Shun’ichi suddenly came to his senses, he caught sight of the sky through the classroom window. A cold chill crept over him as he remembered the time he had fleetingly wished for death. As long as Mizusawa was in the classroom, he could never forget being bullied. Even though Fukiyama was looking out for him now and he felt safe, a part of him remained afraid. Still, the shadow of bullying was slowly but surely drifting away from Shun’ichi.

The homeroom teacher arrived, and a short session concluded. Shun’ichi only called out to Ichihashi as he left the hallway.

"Sanada-kun."

Ignoring the voice calling his name, Shun’ichi pretended not to hear, using the excuse that the front entrance was crowded with students heading home. He felt a hand grab his shoulder, forcing him to stop. Turning around, he saw Akimori standing there, slightly out of breath.

"I’m in a hurry. Did you need something?" Shun’ichi asked.

"Not really," Akimori replied with a smile. "Let’s walk home together. There’s something I want to talk to you about."

Reluctantly, Shun’ichi walked with him out of the school gate. He didn’t want to, but he couldn’t find a reason to refuse. It’s just until we reach the traffic light near the station, he told himself.

"Summer vacation is almost here," Akimori remarked.

Shun’ichi nodded silently. The sun was harsh, and he squinted against the light as they walked along the school’s brick-like tile wall. The cicadas buzzed noisily in the trees by the road, much like Akimori’s incessant chatter.

"Do you have any plans for summer, Sanada-kun?"

"Not really..."

"Then, how about we go to Disneyland? My dad got some tickets from a friend. Let’s go together."

Shun’ichi had never been to that famous theme park before. He was interested, but the idea of going with Akimori didn’t appeal to him.

"I’m good. Go with someone else," he replied.

Akimori’s face immediately fell into a sulk. What a pain, Shun’ichi thought, but soon enough, Akimori’s smile returned.

"Okay, then how about we go to the pool?"

"I don’t like crowded places," Shun’ichi said flatly.

Akimori fell silent, looking down, and Shun’ichi quickened his pace slightly. He just wanted to reach the crosswalk where their paths would diverge.

"Then how about we go somewhere you want to go, Sanada-kun? I’ll follow you anywhere."

It was a strange offer, and Shun’ichi tilted his head in confusion.

"What? Is that fun for you?"

Akimori nodded seriously, "If I’m with you, Sanada-kun, I think I’ll enjoy it too."

"That’s weird," Shun’ichi muttered, watching Akimori bite his lip lightly.

"But... you won’t hang out with me unless I do this, right?"

Hearing this made Shun’ichi feel uncomfortable. To be honest, he didn’t like Akimori’s voice, his face, or even the way he talked. That’s why he didn’t want to spend time with him. But saying he disliked Akimori would only complicate his position within the group.

"It’s not like that..." Shun’ichi deflected ambiguously.

"Then, if you ever feel like going somewhere, invite me along," Akimori pressed.

Cornered, Shun’ichi reluctantly agreed with a simple "Yeah." Akimori seemed satisfied with the promise and didn’t push for any more plans. From there until they reached the crosswalk where they would part ways, Shun’ichi didn’t say a word, except for a quick "Bye."

◇:-:◆:-:◇

On the Friday just before summer vacation, Shun’ichi and Ichihashi were chatting when the conversation turned to a recently released horror movie. They got really excited and decided to see it together the next day. The movie ticket was a bit of a blow to Shun’ichi’s allowance, but the film was amazing. Afterward, they wandered aimlessly around the shopping mall, not really buying anything, and played a few games at the arcade. Even as evening set in, their conversation didn’t run out. Sitting on the fence in the park near the station, eating ice cream, they kept talking until, suddenly, Ichihashi let out a small exclamation.

"Hey, it’s Akimori! Yoo-hoo!"

At the sound of Ichihashi’s voice, the familiar silhouette ahead turned around. Contrary to Shun’ichi’s silent wish for him not to come over, Akimori, as usual, approached with a cheerful smile on his face.

"What are you two up to?"

Ichihashi waved the movie pamphlet in front of Akimori.

"We went to see a movie! It was really good!"

"Really?"

Akimori took the pamphlet, flipping through it casually before glancing over at Shun’ichi from the corner of his eye. Shun’ichi felt like there was anger in that look, and it made him uncomfortable. Why should he feel guilty?

"If you were going to see a movie, you could’ve invited me too," Akimori said.

"Oh, sorry, sorry. But you don’t really like horror, do you?" Ichihashi brushed it off lightly and took the pamphlet back.

"By the way, where are you headed now?" Ichihashi asked.

Akimori sighed. "I’m off to cram school. It sucks, especially during the break for exams. But whatever. Sanada-kun, you’re taking the train home now, right? Let’s go together for part of the way."

Ichihashi stood up at that, despite Shun’ichi wanting to keep talking. "Well, maybe I’ll head home too."

"My place is closer to the station on the other side of the park," Ichihashi said, waving his hand as he strolled off into the park. The moment Ichihashi’s figure disappeared from sight, Akimori’s previously calm demeanor vanished, and he snapped, "That’s not fair!"

"It’s not fair that you’d go to a movie with Ichihashi but won’t make plans with me!" Akimori complained. Shun’ichi, burdened by the guilt that had been following him around, couldn’t argue back and just looked away.

"I just... wanted to see the movie."

"If you wanted to see it, I would’ve gone with you! I would’ve skipped cram school!"

"Just drop it already."

Feeling suffocated, Shun’ichi started walking ahead. But since they were both headed to the station, Akimori quickly followed behind.

"If you want to do something fun, invite me! I’ve been talking to you way before Ichihashi ever was! It’s not fair that you’re suddenly so close to him."

Even without answering, Shun’ichi could feel Akimori’s complaints piling up behind him, like a relentless barrage aimed at his back.

"It’s not fair!" Akimori repeated.

The accusations grated on Shun’ichi’s nerves, and he suddenly whirled around and shouted.

"I don’t want to hang out with you!"

Shun’ichi could see Akimori biting down hard on his lip.

"Give me a reason. Otherwise, I can't accept that."

"Is there really a reason for hating someone?!"

For the first time, Shun’ichi was being completely honest, no longer hiding behind vague excuses. But even then, Akimori didn’t back down.

"Why do you hate me? It doesn’t make sense. I’ve always been nice to you, Sanada-kun. I even warned you about Mizusawa, and because you didn’t listen to me, you ended up getting bullied."

That was the last straw.

"Warned me? Don’t act like you’re so high and mighty!"

"But it’s true, isn’t it? Even when you hit Mizusawa, if I hadn’t told the teacher, you’d still be the one everyone blamed. I’ve always looked out for you, Sanada-kun, so why do you have to put up with getting yelled at and blamed?"

A wave of anger surged through Shun’ichi at Akimori’s self-centered words. He lashed out, kicking the guardrail on the sidewalk as hard as he could with his heel. The loud sound startled the nearby pedestrians, who turned to look at them. Akimori followed quickly as Shun’ichi stomped ahead.

"That’s exactly what pisses me off about you. You’re always so pleased with yourself, like you’ve done something good, acting like some model student. I can’t stand it!"

Akimori’s face turned serious as he denied it.

"I’m not trying to act like a model student. I just care about you, Sanada-kun. That’s why I want to help you."

"I never asked for your help, and that’s what’s so annoying!"

Shun’ichi’s face burned with frustration, his throat dry from yelling. Akimori sighed, shrugging his shoulders, as if he had suddenly grown older.

"I didn’t want to say this, but… honestly, my mom told me I shouldn’t be friends with you. She heard from Mizusawa’s mom that you hit him, and no matter how much I explained the truth, she said, ‘Any kid who throws punches like that has problems.’ But even then, I still wanted to be friends with you."

The way Akimori could so casually say something so condescending right to his face made Shun’ichi feel sick. Did Akimori really want him to say, Thank you for being friends with me even though your mom told you not to?

"Then just leave me alone. You don’t have to hang out with me," Shun’ichi spat out.

He thought Akimori should just follow his mom’s orders, but Akimori shook his head vehemently.

"But I can’t. I care about you, Sanada-kun. I just… can’t stop thinking about you."

"What do you mean, ‘care about’? What, are you a homo or something?"

He didn’t really mean it, but Akimori froze in place, his face tightening with shock. His cheeks turned pale, and though it was unbearably hot out, his lips trembled. His eyes, wide and shimmering, looked like he was on the verge of tears. Akimori could’ve said anything—"Don’t joke around," or "Stop messing with me"—but instead, he just stood there, silent.

"You’ve got to be kidding me..."

Shun’ichi couldn’t bear to look at him like that. He cast his gaze downward, but soon, he heard the sound of sobs welling up from the boy across from him. That sadness pressed heavily against Shun’ichi’s chest, like a suffocating wave threatening to drown him.

"Being gay is disgusting," Shun’ichi muttered.

He hadn’t meant to hurt Akimori, hadn’t intended to push him further, but those were the only words that came out. For a fleeting moment, Kunihiko’s face flashed in his mind.

"It’s just… gross."

He mumbled the words under his breath, but it was enough. Akimori finally crumpled, sinking down to the pavement.

"Don’t cry!"

Even though every fiber of him wanted to walk away and leave Akimori behind, he couldn’t. With a frustrated sigh, Shun’ichi grabbed Akimori by the wrist, pulling him to his feet and forcing him to walk.

"Crying isn’t going to change anything!" Shun’ichi shouted as they moved. "What am I supposed to do about it?!"

Suddenly, Akimori pulled back on Shun’ichi’s hand, stopping him in his tracks. Before he could process what was happening, Shun’ichi felt a fleeting warmth on his lips. In an instant, the sensation was gone, leaving him confused and stunned.

"I hate you too, Sanada-kun!" Akimori glared up at him. "I hate you so much. I’m done with you!"

With those words, Akimori took off, running with all his might. Shun’ichi stood there, dazed, still trapped by the lingering sensation of Akimori’s lips on his. The warm breeze and the fading heat of the day seemed distant now. All that remained was the vivid memory of that brief, wet touch on his lips, as the evening sky dimmed around him.

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