Bluebird: Chapter 10

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The cramped atmosphere inside the car was palpable. Inukai tried starting a conversation from the driver’s seat, but Kawachi only offered the bare minimum in response—“Yeah” or “I guess.” Even Yuu, who could usually brighten the mood, was dozing off in his car seat in the back.

Kawachi sat staring out the left-side window. He wore a white shirt, a navy hoodie, and faded jeans—an outfit perfectly suited for the outdoors. Yet his deeply sullen expression made it clear he had no expectations for this trip. If anything, it screamed that he found the outing a burden.

“Would you like to go camping this weekend?” Inukai had suggested casually after a silent dinner, his stomach knotting in nervous anticipation. He’d prayed Kawachi might agree, but the response had been immediate and firm.

“Impossible,” Kawachi said flatly. “Yuu and Kouta are way too young for camping.”

“I was thinking we’d leave Kouta with Sawako,” Inukai had replied carefully.

Kawachi’s lips curled in displeasure, his distaste starkly visible. “We’re just going to leave Kouta with her when it’s not even work-related?”

His sharp tone had created an uncomfortable tension, and Inukai was about to give up when Sawako herself intervened. She had been playing with Kouta and still hadn’t left for the day.

“Camping sounds wonderful,” she said brightly, joining the conversation. “I’ll be home alone this weekend since my husband’s away, so I’d be happy to look after Kouta!”

“We wouldn’t want to impose that much…” Kawachi said, hesitant.

“Oh, don’t be silly,” Sawako said with a light laugh. “I know I’m not that young anymore. If I can’t manage, I’ll tell you outright. But you know, connecting with nature at a young age is so important for a child’s growth. And it’s not like they’re too young to experience anything.”

Sawako’s confidence, born from years of childcare experience, silenced Kawachi. Still, he tried to escape by muttering, “Then Inukai and Yuu can go by themselves…”

“What are you saying? Camping is a family experience. Children notice when their parents are together and remember these moments. All three of you should go,” Sawako said with a kind firmness that left no room for argument.

With no way out, Kawachi reluctantly agreed, muttering, “If it’s for Yuu’s benefit…” When Inukai glanced at Sawako, she winked at him. She knew the strain between them lately and had gone out of her way to lend a hand. Inukai felt an overwhelming gratitude that nearly brought tears to his eyes.

“By the way, Mizuguchi and his family will be joining us for a barbecue at the campsite,” Inukai added later. “He has three kids, so Yuu should have a great time playing with them.”

Kawachi’s face instantly paled. “What do you mean, a friend’s family? I thought it was just the three of us!”

Inukai regretted not mentioning it sooner, but it was too late now. Kawachi’s expression looked like he was on the verge of tears.

“I don’t know your friends. I’ve never met them or spoken to them. And now I’m supposed to just—”

“Oh, Mizuguchi! Isn’t he the one who married an Omega?” Sawako’s voice cut through, once again diffusing the tension before it could erupt.

“Yes, he met his fated mate in college and married young.”

“Oh, I remember now. What a romantic story!” Sawako exclaimed. “He even came to visit your family estate a few times, didn’t he? Such a charming and friendly man.”

Kawachi’s emotions, which had been teetering on the edge, seemed to deflate. Inukai seized the moment to clarify, “We’re meeting at the campsite at ten. Everything’s been arranged.”

Kawachi stayed silent for a moment before finally sighing and muttering, “Fine.” His agreement sounded more like a concession than actual consent.

Even after agreeing, Kawachi’s frosty demeanor didn’t improve. He avoided mentioning the trip, and Inukai had half-expected him to cancel at the last minute. But the night before, Kawachi had prepared Yuu’s hat, shoes, and backpack. That small gesture reassured Inukai that Kawachi was willing to go.

Before they left, Kawachi asked, “If we’re meeting another family, shouldn’t we bring something?”

“I’ve already talked to Mizuguchi, so everything’s taken care of.”

“We still shouldn’t show up empty-handed.”

“That’s why I offered to cover more of the costs. Besides, this was my idea, so I’m covering everything this time.”

“It’s not about the money,” Kawachi muttered before falling silent again.

Mizuguchi’s family were avid campers who had explored nearly every campsite near the city. They preferred locations closer to nature—mountains and rivers—over well-equipped sites. Today’s destination was deep in the mountains, with a river for the kids to play in.

The fifty-minute drive to the campsite felt unbearably tense. When the two of them were alone at home, Kawachi usually escaped to another room. But in the car, there was no way to flee.

“I met Mizuguchi back in college,” Inukai began, attempting to fill the silence. “His parents are both Betas, so he said he was stunned when he turned out to be an Alpha. He’s a laid-back guy.”

Kawachi didn’t respond, so Inukai kept talking, determined to dispel the oppressive stillness.

“Actually, Mizuguchi works at Kawai, too, though in the research department.”

The moment he said it, Kawachi snapped his head toward him, his expression hard and tense. Inukai knew exactly what he was worried about and felt a pang of sadness.

“I’ve explained the situation to Mizuguchi and told him not to mention it to anyone.”

Kawachi clutched his throat, exhaling softly before slumping forward. “...This is exhausting,” he muttered.

The quiet admission, spoken almost to himself, felt like a knife twisting in Inukai’s chest. Forcing himself to stay calm, he asked, “What’s exhausting?” He kept his eyes on the road.

“Everything.”

The vagueness stung more than any specific complaint, it made Inukai’s back tingle with unease. If it’s all so exhausting, should I make it easier for you right now? Perhaps press the accelerator a bit harder and slam the car into the guardrail on the left? It’s probably a cliff on the other side—there’s a good chance it would be fatal—But then he remembered Yuu. He couldn’t let his son suffer, couldn’t leave Kouta without parents. Pushing the thought away, Inukai decided to pretend he hadn’t heard Kawachi’s words. The car felt heavier, like the air inside was turning to water, suffocating him.

Despite the stifling atmosphere, Yuu slept soundly, lulled by the motion of the car. By the time they arrived at the campsite, Inukai was mentally drained. The heaviness in the car had worn him out to the point where he almost wanted to turn around and leave. But it’s too late for that now.

Inukai parked the car and messaged Mizuguchi to say they had arrived. Mizuguchi replied, directing them to a spot about a five-minute walk from the parking area where they had set up their tents.

Inukai was about to carry Yuu himself, thinking the weight would be too much, but Kawachi was faster. He scooped Yuu into his arms and held him close, his grip firm and protective. The way Kawachi clung to Yuu radiated an unspoken fear, as if he were silently declaring, The only one I can trust is my child. The sight left Inukai with a deep ache in his chest.

Bringing him here might have been a mistake, Inukai thought as he trudged behind Kawachi. How are we supposed to enjoy this with Mizuguchi’s family?

As they neared the campsite, the sound of a child crying reached them. The wailing grew louder as they approached.

“What’s going on?” Kawachi asked, quickening his pace.

“I’ll go ahead and check,” Inukai said, hurrying toward the source of the sound. What he found was Mizuguchi standing near the tents, looking utterly dejected in jeans and a plaid shirt. Nearby, Mizuguchi’s wife, Sari, was struggling to calm their three children who were crying hysterically.

When Mizuguchi noticed Inukai, he forced a sheepish smile. “Oh, you made it.”

The campsite was a mess. The canopy set up for shade was in disarray, and the picnic table was a disaster zone—plates, food, and utensils strewn all over the ground, as though someone had trampled across it. Inukai stood frozen, unable to process the chaos. Mizuguchi rubbed the back of his neck, sighing heavily.

“It was the monkeys...”

“Monkeys?” Inukai echoed, surprised.

"I went to the office to buy firewood for the barbecue, and when I came back, there were about five monkeys here. I think Sari tried to chase them away, but they got aggressive and were about to attack, so she had to take the kids and hide in the car. We managed to chase them off, but… this is the first time anything like this has happened on one of our trips."

By then, Kawachi had caught up, carrying Yuu. He stopped short, staring at the wreckage in wide-eyed disbelief. After Inukai filled him in, Kawachi expressed genuine concern.

“That sounds terrible. Is everyone all right?”

“Yeah, no one’s hurt,” Mizuguchi replied with a tired laugh.

Kawachi scanned the area and thoughtfully suggested, “If the monkeys are already used to this spot, they might come back. It could be better to move to a more open location with better visibility.”

At Kawachi’s suggestion, they decided to relocate. Inukai had wanted to help, but since he had never handled a tent before, he didn’t know what to do. Seeing his confusion, Kawachi offered to take over and gently passed Yuu to Inukai.

There was no time for proper introductions, as they quickly tidied up the area, folded up the tent, and moved to a grassy field with a clear view and no trees. There, they set up the tent again. Kawachi worked with practiced ease, hammering the stakes into the ground swiftly.

Mizukuchi's three children, who had been crying and panicking from the monkey attack, were now intrigued by the new child, Yuu. At first, Yuu hid behind Inukai, feeling shy, but soon, the older children, a bit bigger than him, coaxed him out, and they began playing together.

Mizukuchi's children, with their siblings close in age, knew exactly how to interact with younger kids and make them happy. As they laughed and squealed, following the older kids around, Inukai couldn't help but think to himself, I'm really glad I brought him here.

In less than fifteen minutes, Mizukuchi and Kawachi had successfully set up the tent again.

“I’m sorry to make you help right after you’ve arrived,” Sari said, apologizing, but Kawachi smiled.

“No, it’s been a while since I’ve set up a tent, so I wasn’t sure I’d remember how to do it, but it looks like we managed just fine. I’m glad I could help.”

The heavy, oppressive air from earlier in the car was gone now, replaced by a fresh, open expression on his face.

Lunch was supposed to be a barbecue, but most of the vegetables and meat had been ravaged by the monkeys, so Inukai and Mizukuchi went to a nearby grocery store to buy replacements.

Sari stayed behind to watch the children, and Kawachi took charge of starting the barbecue fire.

As they drove to the store, Mizuguchi glanced at Inukai and asked, “So, Kawachi-san’s your partner, right?”

"Yeah."

"He's a really easy person to talk to. He’s pleasant, and good at everything—quick and efficient."

Inukai felt a sense of warmth wash over him when Mizukuchi complimented the person he loved.

"He's kind and gentle to everyone," Inukai added.

Mizukuchi tilted his head slightly. “Hmm... I only met him once during the job interview, and honestly, I don’t remember much about him. I thought he was delicate and androgynous, but when I saw him again, I was shocked—it was like a completely different person. He’s built better than both of us, right? Must have worked out a lot. I can’t believe he is the one who gave birth to your kids. It’s hard to imagine.”

Inukai smiled slightly, feeling that familiar rush of pride. "He really did. I was there when the second one was born, and I was so moved I couldn’t stop shaking. Tears just kept coming. And now, I think we’re expecting a third."

Mizukuchi scratched his head with one hand, laughing nervously. "I know Omega men can get pregnant, but it's still hard to imagine him actually giving birth."

It was hard to imagine, but Inukai knew the truth. He had seen it with his own eyes. Two children—his children—were born from that very man.

"By the way," Mizukuchi said, breaking his thoughts, "where do you and he stand, Inukai-san?"

Inukai repeated, "Where do we stand?" quietly, to himself.

"You know, a place where both of you feel at peace. If someone’s been into women before and now they're with a man, it’s bound to be difficult... Like, is it okay if you can at least talk things out? Or if you want to have a normal couple's life if possible..."

The car pulled into the parking lot of the grocery store. Even after parking, Mizukuchi didn’t get out. He was waiting for a response.

Inukai thought carefully, then realized with a pang that his one desire was so simple.

“...I just want to be loved by him.”

Mizukuchi let out a small, bitter laugh. "Well, that’s something else."

"Really... that's all I want. I just want him to recognize me, to love me. For that, I would do anything..."

At his heartfelt words, Mizukuchi whispered with a soft chuckle, "Man, you’re such a romantic."

◇:-:◆:-:◇

By the time they returned to the campsite with the large haul of groceries, it was already past one in the afternoon. Though a little delayed, they began the barbecue. Since it was dangerous for the children to get too close to the fire, Mizukuchi and Kawachi took turns grilling the meat and vegetables, placing them on plates to be served by Sari and Inukai to the children.

Kawachi, likely sweating from the heat of the fire, wiped his brow and blew out a sigh as he continued grilling. It seemed like hard work, and Inukai considered suggesting a switch, but Kawachi was unusually cheerful, so Inukai couldn't bring himself to interrupt.

Mizukuchi’s children, without anyone teaching them, began referring to Kawachi as "Yuu-chan's papa." Technically, he was Yuu’s "mama," but no one corrected them.

When the barbecue was finished, Mizukuchi’s children gathered around Kawachi. Since he was strong, they seemed to enjoy hanging from his arms or being lifted up and spun around. He quickly became the center of attention, and a line of eager children formed, waiting for their turn to play.

After a while, Mizukuchi’s eldest son suddenly said, “I want to go to the river~!” Mizukuchi tried to take him, but the second son clung to Kawachi’s leg and said, “I want to go with Yuu-chan’s papa~!” Even when Sari told him to go with his papa, he stubbornly insisted, “I want to go with Yuu-chan’s papa!” In the end, it was decided that Mizukuchi and Kawachi would take the eldest and second son to the river. Meanwhile, Sari and Inukai stayed behind to put Yuu-chan and Mizukuchi’s sleepy daughter to bed in the tent.

Sari, who was experienced with camping, quickly cleaned up the mess from the children’s scattered barbecue leftovers and returned to the tent with Mizukuchi’s eldest daughter and Yuu-chan after about twenty minutes.

“Yuu-chan is just so cute~,” Sari said as she leaned in close to the sleeping child.

“She looks just like Inukai-san, like an angel. Just having little ones around is so soothing, but when they’re as cute as this, you never want to let them go even for a moment.”

Mizukuchi’s youngest child, the eldest daughter, was three years old. Though they had likely been intimate during heat cycles, they’d been married for over ten years and still only had three children. It was likely because, even with contraception, the act itself helped suppress the heat cycle. Well, that was the usual scenario.

“Um…” Inukai spoke up.

Sari turned around. “What is it?”

“…Is it okay if I ask about Omega characteristics?”

He was worried it might come off as inappropriate to bring up such a topic with a woman, but Sari responded without hesitation, “Of course, ask me anything.”

“I’ve heard from Mizukuchi that you’ve been talking about Kawachi-san and that Inukai-san has been struggling with some things. If there’s anything I can help with…”

It seemed that Mizukuchi had mentioned something beforehand. That made things easier. It was a relief.

Opening the tent entrance to make sure the children were still asleep, the two of them sat down in the chairs under the tarp. Despite the children being sound asleep, Inukai hesitated to talk about matters of sex while they were nearby.

Sari handed him a mug of roasted green tea. It seemed she’d made a lot and brought it in a thermos. “When we first started camping, I was all about making everything from scratch, but as we got used to it, I’ve started cutting corners and making things easier,” she said with a smile.

The warm aroma of the tea wrapped around his heart, soothing and softening it.

“Inukai-san, you two can’t get through a heat cycle without sex, right? ...That must be really tough for both you and Kawachi-san,” Sari said kindly.

Inukai was taken aback, and before he could stop himself, he almost started crying. He quickly steadied himself, pulling his emotions back together.

“I have a friend whose younger siblings are both Omega, but their heat cycles are completely different from each other. It’s really a matter of individual differences,” Sari continued.

Her words, spoken from the perspective of another Omega, carried a sense of genuine understanding.

“When I heard from Mizukuchi about Kawachi-san, I also posted about it in an Omega community on social media, but there wasn’t anyone there who was as severe as Kawachi-san. It’s really different, huh?”

It was clear now that Kawachi’s condition was abnormal. Even the doctor had told him he’d never seen anything this severe before. It hit home once again.

“Um… when Mizukuchi and I went shopping, it was just you and Kawachi-san, right? Did he say anything about me? I think it would’ve been easier for him to open up to you since you’re an Omega too. If he vented or complained about anything, I’d really like to know.”

Sari looked at Inukai intently. In her dark, beautiful eyes, he could see the image of a man desperately trying to control his emotions.

“I’m not getting along well with Kawachi-san. He barely speaks to me, and if there’s something bothering him, I want to know why, but he won’t tell me. Even this camping trip—he didn’t want to come, but I forced him to.” Inukai hesitated for a moment, as if the words were stuck in his throat. “I thought maybe, with you being an Omega too, Sari-san, he might open up about his complaints. Maybe you could help him talk to me…”

Sari’s eyes slowly moved from side to side, as if unsure whether she should say what she was about to.

I don’t want to hear this... Inukai’s heart tightened, his stomach churning with unease. But if I don’t know, I’ll keep wondering, and I won’t be able to sleep when I get home...

“I'm fine. Please, anything. Just tell me," he pressed, desperation leaking into his voice.

Sari sighed softly before speaking.

“Well, this is something I heard second-hand from Mizukuchi, so I’m not sure if I should be saying it... but... when I was with Kawachi-san alone, he... casually said, ‘I want a divorce.’”

Inukai felt a sharp, painful thud in his chest. He knew about the divorce papers hidden in the drawer, but hearing Kawachi’s intention confirmed out loud made the air around him feel suffocating. No… I don’t want to divorce. I don’t want to lose him. I’ve only just gotten what I wanted—he’s my ‘fated mate.’ And we have children…

Sari held her cheek, looking slightly concerned.

“But... even though he said that... I don’t think it’s because he hates you. It doesn’t seem like he wants a divorce because of you.”

Inukai felt as though he were falling into a pit of despair, only to feel a small spark of hope flicker through the darkness.

“Wait… I... I don’t understand. If he wants a divorce, doesn’t that mean it’s because he doesn’t like me?”

Sari reached out and gently placed her hand on Inukai’s shoulder to calm him down.

“I’m sorry for getting so worked up,” Inukai muttered, his voice trembling. “I’ve been... confused. I’ve been at a loss for so long, not knowing what to do…”

Sari began to rub his back gently, trying to soothe him.

“Do you love Kawachi-san?” she asked quietly.

“I do. I love him... with all my heart.”

It had been a long, long one-sided love. He had almost given up so many times when Kawachi wouldn’t look at him. Even though their relationship had started in such an unplanned, unwilling way, they had children, they got married, they lived together… In Inukai’s mind, he’d never imagined he could be any happier. He thought Kawachi had settled into their life too. The peaceful days they’d shared had started to change dramatically after last month’s heat cycle.

If Kawachi had been distant and aloof from the beginning, Inukai wouldn’t have been hurt by the events of this camping trip. He would’ve simply accepted that he could never be fully accepted, that their relationship would only consist of sex once a year and the presence of their children.

But that hadn’t been the case. They had become a family. He had been there for the birth of their second child, and everything seemed to be evolving into something better. Then, the coldness Kawachi began to show him and the discovery of the divorce papers had hit Inukai like a wave of devastation. That’s why he couldn’t help himself—he clung to his friends, desperately trying to fix things, even if it made him look pitiful.

“So, it’s not like you just got married because you had a child during his heat cycle, right?”

“No, that’s not it. Kawachi-san is my fated mate, and I’ve been in love with him for a long time. I love him, and I’m so happy that we became a family.”

“Well, maybe you should just tell him that.”

Inukai let out a deep, shaky breath. He knew he had to talk to Kawachi, but something still kept him from doing it.

I’ve told him before, that I love him, that it’s always been him. But if he’s saying something like that… am I really not getting through to him?

“I’ve told him everything, that I’ve been in love with him and that I care for him deeply.”

“Really?” Sari’s brow furrowed, her head tilting slightly in doubt. “Because Kawachi told me he thought you’d given up on him.”

“What?!” The word burst out before Inukai could stop himself, loud enough to risk waking the children. He hurriedly clamped a hand over his mouth and glanced at them. Thankfully, neither child stirred. His voice dropped to a harsh whisper. “What dos he mean by that?”

Does he really feel that way? Inukai’s mind raced, but his thoughts were drowned by a flash of pain in his chest.

Sari let out a small sigh and continued.

“I got the feeling that Kawachi-san doesn’t hate you. It seemed like… he still cares, in his own way. But... it’s hard to say.”

Care? Does that mean he likes me? The thought filled Inukai with a confusing swirl of hope and frustration. If Kawachi cared about him, why would he bring up divorce? Why couldn’t they just stay together?

“But… if you’re fated mates, shouldn’t you be inseparable once you meet? I mean, I love Mizukuchi, but... this is a secret, okay? He’s not really my type... but, once we got to know each other, it didn’t matter. It’s like my heart, my body, everything just rushed toward him, and I realized he was the one who could make me happy.”

Her words were sweet and romantic, like something from a storybook. Inukai could feel the bittersweet warmth of Sari’s confession, but...

I can’t even imagine being that sure of myself, of him, like Sari and Mizukuchi.

“I realized he was my fated mate, so I confessed... but Kawachi rejected me coldly. Maybe it was because we’re both men, but…”

Sari furrowed her brow in thought.

“Maybe, like with me and Mizukuchi, even if things don’t seem to heat up right away, little by little, like a small flame growing bigger, the feelings could change over time. Also, pheromones are a big factor, I think. During my heat cycle, Mizukuchi looked way more attractive to me, and I started thinking... maybe my eyes were just all messed up from it.”

Inukai couldn’t help but chuckle, but the laughter quickly turned into a heavy silence. The feeling of longing and melancholy settled in after.

What does he see when he looks at me during his heat?

Is he more attracted to me now than usual? Kawachi, who liked women, had never seen him as a romantic partner. That fact would never change. It was something that would always be there, a constant reminder.

That was why Inukai couldn’t be confident about his own appearance.

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